The Love of a Man and a Woman

by Arya Putra

The love of a man and a woman is a reflection of the love of the Self for the Supreme Self.  It is a shadow of the love of the Soul for GOD (the Supreme Soul).


Love is real, but we only find real love when we stop looking for it in the wrong places.  How can you find love in someone else if you haven’t discovered it within your own self?  Once you discover (uncover) that Love within your self, no one can take that away. In fact, no one can give you what you already have.  But when the other has the same love that you have, you can share that love together.


The problem is that most people do not share real love.  Instead, they share their mind games.  Love is NOT emotional hole-filling.  When we are full of love we can share it without any fear of losing it, because real love is both beginingless and endless.  Real love is Eternal.


Is there no longing or desire in real love?  Certainly there is longing and desire, because these feelings point the way to (allude to) the highest heaven, to Liberation (Moksha).  The longing for affection is natural, and the desire for intimate experience is healthy.  Human beings long for affection and desire the deepest pleasure because the soul wants to feel totally alive and vibrantly whole.  The core of our being (Atman) wants to experience the union with God (Moksha) and can never be fully satisfied until this YOGA is attained.


The natural longing and desire in a man and woman compels them to look beyond themselves.  The wisdom of Consciousness then guides them to look within.  In the purified chamber of the heart, they realize the true nature of love, and know without any doubt that true love is absolutely painless, because it is absolutely selfless.  This ‘knowing’ takes them ‘upward,’ beyond themselves. 


The opposite of real love is love born out of self-involvement. Self-involved love makes us ‘outward bound,’ whereas the love of the Self (the Real Self) makes us ‘upward’ bound. True love always raises our consciousness.  False love always ‘raises hell.’ In other words, false love is self-seeking, which is why it is always looking for excitement, whereas true love is based on commitment and loyalty to one’s higher nature (which is the Higher Nature of everyone).  In real love, we see our self as a soul and we see the other as a soul.


Love is God and God is Love.  Are there different Gods?  No.  God is One and Indivisible, but is manifested in many ways, and all those ways are GOOD. The ways of Love are good, whether manifested as the relationship between a man and a woman, a parent and a child, a brother and a sister, or a friend and friend. All these relationships are a drama, and the drama is meaningful only from the perspective of the soul.  From the perspective of the mind filled with images and unreality, these relationships are also a drama but that drama is essenceless, it is just a play of the mind and NOT a play of the divine.


True relationships of love are a divine play, a Lila, a divine Game, a divine Sport. To win, we have to play by the rules (the laws of Consciousness), which have been spelled out in the scriptures and interpreted by the Wise.


Stay positive, stay inspired, and stay away from people who will hurt you by using you as an object of their mind and ego. You will realize the essence of love when you realize your own essence.

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